Tag: silly

You Can Write Too!

Posted on by Gazimoff

Boxes of chocolates are like boxes of frogs. They’re both boxes. Unfortunately, that’s where the similarity ends, as anyone who’s received a box of frogs on Valentine’s Day will surely agree. So, boxes of frogs are actually nothing like boxes of chocolates, and should under no circumstances be used as a gift for loved ones. In fact, putting frogs in boxes is a ludicrous idea, unless you happen to be a biologist specialising in amphibians.

Another thing completely unlike a box of frogs is a blog about massively multiplayer online role-playing games, such as this one. The construction, creation and maintenance of a collection of articles about your favourite MMOs is a happy, frog-free zone in which you can share your thoughts, opinions and ideas on the games you play. It can be anything you like, from the straight-talking dispenser of sage advice to the surreal idealist struggling against an inner pessimist.

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That 6AM Moment

Posted on by Gazimoff

Have you ever had that moment when you’ve been playing an MMO for so long that you lose track of time completely? Where the darkness outside slowly gives way to grey sunlight? Where you mistake the dawn chorus for someone playing Angry Birds nearby?

When I started playing Star Wars: The Old Republic with my wife, I expected her to be a moderating influence on me. Alas, unlike Syp over at Bio Break, Molotovchicken has been playing MMOs for longer than I have. As a result  we’re both having so much fun that we’re egging each other on. Just finish this zone. Just finish this class quest. Just finish this planet. The next thing you know it’s 6AM in the morning and you’re wondering where the time has gone.

That’s Bioware’s biggest hook though – the story grabs you by both hands, pulling you through the game. It might still be Kill Ten Rats in places, but by golly these Republic Rats have got away with it for long enough and their actions are an insult to the Empire!

Ahem.

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How Beer Prevents the Zombie Apocalypse

Posted on by Gazimoff

I’ve been thinking recently about zombies and beer. You might think that the two are unrelated to each other, but I think there’s more about it than you’d think at first glance. You see, I think that we can avoid the upcoming zombie apocalypse through the careful and in-depth study of beer. Allow me a moment to explain.

There’s a lot said about the upcoming zombie apocalypse, and I’m fast coming to the conclusion that most people have it wrong. There won’t be a mysterious plague or infectious bite that will spread from person to person. There won’t be a secret mutagenic compound that will be leaked into the water supply. I don’t even think we’ll have rage-infested simians to deal with.

No, I reckon that the zombie apocalypse will be brought on by the devolution of our own intellect. By continually offloading our need to think, to make decisions, to experiment, we’ll become our own zombies. Devioid of any ability or desire to reason or argue, our precious grey matter will start to atrophy until the cranium containing it begins to collapse inward. Our thoughts and opinions will be based on what we’re told to have.

Go eat Brain. Brain taste good. BrainCo deep-fried medulla oblongata with major sauce taste best. Only ten credits. Nom now, nom often!

How would beer protect us from such a devastating end? Simple.

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The Flaming Kitty Copter

Posted on by Gazimoff

Crafting is one of those things I love about MMOs. Being able to gather stuff in the game world and make items from them always makes me smile. It doesn’t even matter if they’re useful or not as long as they do something – anything.

The only thing that gnaws at me is that crafting always seems to be a little limited. From Warcraft to Minecraft there are specific schematics that stipulate the stuff that’s required to make the item. You never get a chance to go off schema.

At least not normally…

I don’t know how I made the connection, but it all started back on an episode of GroupQuest. We were talking about Fandral Staghelm transforming into a flaming cat as one of his phases, and how he also dropped loot that would allow any druid to become a flaming cat too. Of course I had to take it a step too far.

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The Merits of Old Content

Posted on by Gazimoff

One of the discussions I hear popping up every so often is about old content. It’s a bit of a shame that every time a new tier of raiding comes out that the old tier gets abandoned, gathering dust and cobwebs. The Justice and Valour point system means that new raiders can skip old content completely, using heroic instances to buy raid gear and get into the current stuff.

Content from old expansions is even less less used unless there’s a mount or a legendary weapon that can be farmed from it. Molten Core is still useful for people wanting Thunderfury, but it’s not exactly a popular destination.

So what can you use old content for? Aside from mounts and legendaries, there’s a stack of achievements just waiting to be picked up. With the new guild achievement system there’s some easy points there for people that can get their guilds organised. Plus since most content can be zerged it’s a bit of fun, especially if you’re doing 25-man dungeons with ten people.

It also allows the veterans to give a bit of a history lesson on old raids…

How about you? What do you use old raids and content for? Are you hunting for all the guild achievements? Or do you something else to let off steam as a guild?

My 3 Warcraft Christmas Wishes

Posted on by Gazimoff

Curio standing in front of a large portal, surrounded by Christmas decorations

Every year we ask each other what we would wish for Christmas. For some of us it’s something sensible like a new computer chair, while for others it’s something crazy like a Nerf Havok. Either way, we all have something we’d love to get our hands on.

But what would you do if Blizzard asked you for your Christmas wishes? What would you say to Greg Street, Chris Metzen and Tom Chilton if they showed up at your door asking what you wanted for Winter Veil? That’s the idea behind this post: my top three things I’d ask Blizzard to give me for Christmas.

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The Machine Behind The Curtain

Posted on by Gazimoff

I’m going to start this off with a question.

Does the amount of fun you have with Warcraft decrease as the amount you know about the game increases?

I’ve been thinking about this question ever since I read an article by Larísa of Pink Pigtail Inn about someone who’d burned out on Warcraft, developing the belief that ultimately the game boils down to pressing a button on a random number generator and getting rewarded no matter the result.

This makes me nervous because of my own quest to improve my knowledge of the game. I want to improve my own ability and I like being able to share what I find with others. But should I be fearful of poisoning my enjoyment of it by finding out too much? Am I destined to become a bitter, grumpy old mage who snaps his staff in disgust?

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Under The Sea

Posted on by Gazimoff

Spoiler Alert: Pictures of fish! With funny names! And funny faces! And nothing at all to do with anything else really, apart from the funny fishes! It’s not even mage-y!

As you probably know already, Cataclysm ushers in a whole range of changes. New places to explore, new creatures to see. For the seasoned adventurer it’s like being a kid in a toystore – you want to look at everything all at once, and your determined to try growing a bazillion eyes in order to do it.

Since I’ve been spending a lot of time gawking at these strange creatures instead of actually doing any beta testing, I thought I’d share some pictures of them. Be warned, there are pictures of fish ahead.

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Games Within Games Within Games

Posted on by Gazimoff

I used to exclusively play single-player games, drifting from title to title from month to month. After I’d finished eating through the content that the developers had created, the game was finished for me. Achievements or multiplayer modes didn’t exist nearly as much back then, so there wasn’t really anything else left to play for.

Singe I started playing Warcraft, I’ve bought what, maybe a handful of games? All of them titles that I’ve wanted to try out, that have looked cool, that have felt right.

Know how many I’ve completed? Zip. Nada. Zilch.

I must suck as a gamer or something.

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My You’re a Tall One

Posted on by Gazimoff

Over in Dalaran they’ve been breeding their Gnome Mages big. I mean, really big. Bigger than a Tauren, and you have to admit that’s pretty big. Of course I’m not expecting you to take it on trust, so I’ve included a handy picture of just how big these Gnomes can get.

In fact, they can get so big that they’re larger than most mounts. They literally dwarf the surrounding population!

Of course, a Giant Gnome does need a Giant Mount to carry him around. I’m not sure if there’s room for anything else outside Dalaran’s south bank. Not with him there at any rate.

I wish I could claim credit for this one, but alas it was another gnome mage entirely. I was merely an innocent bystander, capturing images to share with the rest of the world. He did, however, share with me his secret as one gnome mage to another. Of course I’m not going to spell it out to you, but I’d suggest starting with Thunderbrew’s Hard Ale and working from there…